The path of Red Tantra is the journey of partnership. This is a quest undertaken by the inner Queen / King aspects that are activated during the ages thirty through sixty…after we complete our Saturn return that ends our youth.
This path of creating Sacred Union externally with another is only truly possible when we have learnt to balance our inner opposites. This is the foundation we lost when empires like ancient Rome outlawed our Sacred Union wisdom teachings and practices.
Given that we have been blindly navigating the terrain of relationships without a template or wisdom to steer our ships, the majority of modern day relationships have not matured and this is what results in pain and trauma we mistakenly associate with love.
When the inner princess and knight are at the helm we fall in love with a projected ideal and then resent and reject partners when they don’t measure up.
This level of partnership is illustrated in the Tarot as the Three of Cups. This card depicts the ‘honeymoon phase’ when we’re ‘in love’ with our own unexpressed aspects we’ve projected externally onto another. In the love bubble we feel whole. Without them we feel incomplete. This is why people refer to their partner as their ‘other half’.
This relationship model is known as co-dependency, a dynamic where we rely upon ‘the other’ to do that which we think we are unable to do for ourselves. This status quo creates polarisation and disempowerment that are experienced as feelings of neediness and insecurity in one partner and suffocation and resentment in the other until they individuate from the other in order to grow into a fuller version of ourselves.
If we don’t utilise the time while single to embrace the white path of Tantra by creating sacred union within, we simply repeat the pattern with someone else…we fall in love again with our projection of the perfect partner and then reject them when we realise they too, are human and incomplete.
If you’d like to get off this not so merry-go-round, check out my book, Sacred Union in Partnerships.
Consider gifting it to yourself or someone you love – perhaps as a wedding gift as it has beautiful love rituals as well as a template for a conscious courtship for those seeking to date.